Eight Months Later

The alligator in...

Who knows where the time goes? My last post was October of last year. When last we met I was driving to Highlands, NC serenaded by a high-pitched whine in the engine of my car. That whine turned out to be the planetary gears that failed completely once I got home and required a new transmission to solve the problem. My bargain little old lady driven only on Sundays car has turned out not to be such a bargain after all.

... Alligator Pond

Back in Sarasota, it became apparent that the cross-country trip had unintended consequences. Suddenly my quiet life in The Oaks with all its beauty and comfort seemed unsustainable. My beloved cousin is reinventing her life and I realized I needed to reinvent mine. For three years I had been living a Taoist ideal. The man of a certain age, acquitted of his obligations, retiring to a walled garden for meditation and contemplation – punctuated by dinner parties and black-tie affairs. 

As restorative as that was after my three years abroad (hmm, three years again), I had not succeeded in making a life on my own. My attempts to find work, either volunteer or paid, had not borne fruit. My circle of friends, with a few exceptions, had not expanded beyond my cousins circle of friends. 

The Florida skies

Reviewing my options, I kept being drawn back to Palm Springs, a place I never expected to live, but a place that grew to be more attractive as I reviewed what was important to me. So, in February I flew back to Palm Springs and spent ten days with my friends Bob and Doug to vet the place. I was encouraged by how friendly people are, and the demographic diversity. I loved the mid-century feel, and the reasonable rents.

I never thought of myself as a dessert person, but I felt comforted by the mountain views and sweeping dessert skies. I also saw that there were possibilities to supplement my income, or worst case, live on my retirement. One idea I am researching would involve starting a business that would allow me to travel – the best of all possible worlds, IMHO. Finally, I felt like I would be back among like-minded people. For better or worse, I am a Californian. I love the diversity of land and people, the woo woo, and the tolerance.

Blue heron

So, on May 3, I left Sarasota. I shipped my belongings ahead, said adieu to my few dear friends, my beloved cousin, and drove off. My route this time will be reasonably direct. Last night I arrived in Alexander City, Alabama for a brief visit with maternal cousins. Sunday, I will drive to northern Louisiana to do a mini-exploration of bayou country. I'll stop by San Antonio to visit my brother and his wife. God willing, and if the creek don't rise, I'll be in Palm Springs by May 15. I've taken an apartment month to month to scope out the many possibilities in housing. I'll begin my research in ernest for my business idea. I'll reconnect with friends throughout the state, and hopefully begin making new ones.

 I will miss the beauty of the Sarasota area and especially The Oaks Bayside where I have been living. I'll miss the tropical flora and fauna. I'll miss the beaches that I hardly ever got to except for drive-bys. I'll miss the dear people who have become my friends as well as my cousin's, but we will keep in touch thanks to technology.

Harlrey dude

I'll miss Harley dude, my cousin's cat who, after an extensive trial period, acknowledged my existence and allowed me an occasional pet.

I won't miss my cousin. We are joined at the heart. We have been together for lifetimes and we will continue to be together, just not in the same physical space. For now.

I am reactivating the blog to provide trip reports for anyone interested. Depending on my attention span, I may continue it as I explore possibilities. Unfortunately, or maybe  not, there is no user's manual for single men of a certain age (I just can't bring myself to describe myself as elderly).

Water lilies

My dear friend Nell Martin champions the word Elderhood to describe this period of life and is doing valuable work trying to redefine it. As I embark on this next adventure, I will be doing my own redefinition. Being at the forefront of the tidal wave of baby boomers entering their "golden years" in these uncertain times, I feel like a pioneer. No map. No compass. Following my intuition. Hoping for the best. Expecting nothing. Wish me luck, And good luck to you.